Week 5 Assignment: Part 1

Part 1

Headline: Emergency bra and pumpkin race
Problem: This headline is eye-catching, but there is no verb. This headline does not summarize the content of the article, which is actually two articles.
Solution: Bra provides full coverage from nuclear gas
Source: The Korea Herald, English Cafe, Don’t Miss section: http://www.koreaherald.com/national/Detail.jsp?newsMLId=20100923000417

Headline: CMS board to talk of school fates for those on ‘the list’
Problem: Awkward. Too long. Too many prepositions. Assumes readers know what ‘the list’ means. Doesn’t follow principle of web pages providing content that stands alone. Don’t know what the article is about.
Solution: Charlotte schools avoid closure
Source: The Charlotte Observer, Education section: http://www.charlotteobserver.com/2010/09/25/1716366/board-to-talk-of-school-fates.html

Headline: More schools trying to serve Washington-grown food–but it isn’t easy
Problem
: Too long. Trying is a weak verb. We’ve learned in our textbook that dashes are to be avoided, lazy punctuation
Solution: Students eat local food when budgets allow
Source: The Seattle Times, Education section: http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/localnews/2012998021_locallunches26m.html

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About susanrene

sister, friend, lover, learner
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